Ah how the hours are passing us by at Gate A6 of Joburg Airport...We have adopted the view TIA and are just chilling, every time some poor bugger in a SAA Uniform appears they are surrounded by a mob of angry passengers. It’s like watching Airport the South African Episode. There are always so many experts in a crisis; luckily they are all in a gang at the gate waiting to pounce on their next unsuspecting SAA Employee. I don’t know why they waste their energy, it’s not like they are going to load the catering any quicker, they are on strike for heaven’s sake. Rumours are abound that they are loading the Frankfurt flight,(Germans complain louder) and then they are coming to load ours...we wait with bated breath..... Mike, who has almost become renamed “Twat”, is sat here photo shopping a selection of photos of yours truly, but changing the skin tone to Green!! He spends all his time being horrible to me. It’s a power complex thing so I just call him “Twat” and leave him to it. I thought Carl and Julie had OCD but the way he is ensuring every skin tone is the right shade of green is a little anal. Still it keeps him quiet and I haven’t had to fork out for some crayons and a colouring book yet.
***Update*** The Frankfurt Flight is loaded and now it is our turn, the mob have got her surrounded now, there’s lots of arm waving and gesticulating. Too much energy being expended if you ask me..... Apparently it’s all gods’ will..... there are quite a lot of Christian type people on this flight, I think they have been on a Pilgrimage, best they don’t come knocking on my seat or they will be given some heavenly direction. That just about sums up our luck, fancy being on a flight full of JW’s...... ah a not so Christian Indian has just walked past giving ear aching to a Poor SAA guy... I just love watching all this stuff, its very entertaining. There are the ranting and raving mob by the gate waiting to pounce on anybody that breathes, and now the JW’s are having a bit of a Prayer Meeting, All we need now is a chorus of Rhianna and our night will be complete.
Its funny I am sat quite happy, very chilled and not a bit incensed because it is incompetence and not corruption that is holding me up. If I thought for one minute that the catering truck had been held up at a Police Checkpoint, I would be joining the baying mob..... Things are looking up, there is a truck with a yellow light at the plane, and .......... we are good to go!! I am almost ready for the UK Customs wanting to do a body search now..... well everything else has happened, so why not let them have a go too..It might be easier to go to Afghanistan next time.....only joking my little swamp duck. We are on our way